MGM studios recently released two uncut horror films on DVD. One of them was one of my favourite slashers, not because it’s amazing but because of a 30 something second massacre. It’s called The Burning. It’s a blatant Friday the 13^th rip-off, but a great one at that. I’ll get to that movie once I find it on DVD because unfortunately these DVDs are tough to find. The other film was a quaint little horror film called Scarecrows. I hadn’t seen it before but I figured it had to be a good horror flick if it was released alongside The Burning. It’s not amazing, but it’s got pitch perfect atmosphere and setting.

The film opens with a news broadcast telling us about a robbery as we see a plane screeching across forestland. There is an unsettling stench in the air, you get the feeling something just isn’t right. Inside the plane are five heist men and women holding the pilot and his daughter hostage as they try to make their way to Mexico with a large sum of money. It is here that we find one of them carrying his plan foreword. He throws a smoke grenade, and jumps out of the plane with the money; he’s obviously betrayed his heist mates. The four others proceed to follow him, three of which jump out of the plan for chase while the other guards the pilot and his daughter for a safe landing. Unknowing to all involved is that they land on a haunted cornfield where scarecrows await them. Once the gang comes close to their backstabber the scarecrows jump out and gut him, stuffing his body with the money.

Sadly, that’s about it when it comes to the plot. There are no explanations as to why or who or where but enough of it to carry onward in a somewhat tolerable pace. Sooner or later everyone reaches an unoccupied farmhouse where we see a photo of, presumably who used to live there. The Fowler family as billed on the credits, but even that isn’t mentioned in the film. We are to assume that they are in fact the three scarecrows. Which are actually sort of zombie scarecrows. While the acting is bad and the plot thinner than Kate Moss, director William Wesley shows off some serious talent creating profound creepy atmosphere. The silence in the air, the close ups of scarecrows (while too many) and the setting are fantastic. The scarecrows themselves are great looking, their faces resemble blank human stares while the tattered and torn clothing add to the creepy factor. The robbers have one girl who screams Barbie, while the rest of them each fit the character slot. The leader even goes insane at one point talking to his dead buddy.

The film may have some downfalls, but its atmosphere takes it up a couple pegs allowing for a really enjoyable viewing for horror fans. It’s nothing more or less than a good horror movie that feels a bit dated and at 12 bucks or so it’s definitely worth it.

I went over to Cinema-Suicide and saw the new poster of Funny Games. I had completely forgot about this entire thing. After further investigation I have discovered the Funny Games trailer on youtube. It’s looking to be a shot for shot remake, meaning (i hope…) NAKED CITY. When I first saw Funny Games I was so overwhelmed by the fact that one of my favourite bands, Naked City (John Zorn, who also created the Big Gundown a reworked cover album of Ennio Morricone’s work) pumped through my speakers as the titles were shown on screen. Funny Games is a brilliant film. I couldn’t get enough of it. I had to watch it again. Thats right, I saw it twice in a row. I didn’t wake up in time for school the next day because of it. But my life was changed.

“You shouldn’t forget the importance of entertainment.”

Fuckin’ yeah.

(if the youtube video doesn’t work here is the link for the msn video: http://video.msn.com/?mkt=en-us&??f=msnmovies/64&vid=c85ab50d-6ed1-4ea4-9e72-f281e8d11864)

Yay. I get to see a special screening of the new Wizard of Gore with Crispin Glover on thursday october the 18th. Courtesy of Rue-Morgue. Click image for more info.

Expect a review. Should be great fun.

When I made my first appearance to the Toronto Film Festival back in 2002, I caught a screening of Takashi Miike’s Zebraman. It was a loud and energetic and was more clever the half of the other films I caught that year. It was an intentional cult film with the likeness of Godzilla and Power Rangers. It was my first time seeing a Miike film with other Miike fans. The film seemed to feed off of the audience. It was astounding. Sukiyaki Western Django is no different. It’s loud, violent, beautiful, funny and in every way a Miike film.

The film opens in a brilliantly designed set with colorful backdrops adding a comic like atmosphere. Tarantino plays Piringo, a gunslinger toying with a snake’s egg when a group of bandits jump him. He proceeds to tell them about the Battle of Dannoura in 1185. A Japanese twist on the War of the Roses. Accents are put on and off during the entire prologue. Piringo finishes his story with a bang. Well, a couple of bangs as blood sprays on the painted backdrops of mountains. He cracks the egg, pours it into his Sukiyaki dish, cue the laughter. The title’s swish into screen: Sukiyaki Western Django (obvious Japanese wordplay on Spaghetti Western).

The rest of the film is set hundreds of years after the battle of Dannoura, the 1800’s. We are introduced to the town of Nevada, and upon further investigation, it’s really Nebada since the Japanese have no v sound. In comes the man with no name, and I call it that because the story is basically the same as Fistful of Dollars with samurai twists, which actually is Yojimba. The man with no name (Hideaki Ito) is pinned between the Heike (red) and Genji (white) clans where he apparently has to make up his mind as to which clan he should join, both of which are in Nebada for the prosperous gold which it holds. In comes young Heihachi, a half Genji half Heike child whose father was slain by Heike madman Henry (aka Kiyomori (Koichi Sato)). Heihachi’s grandmother, Ruriko has a secretive past as a natural gunslinger and runs the general goods store. Heihachi’s mother, Shizuka has sworn revenge against the Heike and takes refuge as a dancer for the Genji. The cast seems to enjoy what they are doing and you can see the fun they are having.

What is truly unique is the fact that Miike has all the actors speaking their lines in English, but despite their inability to understand the language, it comes off as challenge in tolerance. But no need to fret for the subtitles allows the film to carry on without it interfering. It’s interesting to see the two cultures of the west and east collide; the sets use both samurai and western themes. The film is frequently funny and the action sequences are phenomenal, including a brilliantly shot and directed scene where the man with no name jumps through a window and onto his horse. Only a few elements are tiresome and boring. There are long pauses of silence, which although allow Miike to work his visual magic, is a pain to sit through due to the 20 minutes of awkward scenes led by Takuyuki Kagawa who plays the clinically insane sheriff. Without those 20 minutes, the film would run at a perfect 100 minutes. The scenes are good and the performance is great, it just feels like it shouldn’t belong. Miike uses a wide array of emotions, colours and sounds to bring a truly fun film for fans to enjoy. He uses a style that embraces the vibrant jokes film portrays. While the film isn’t necessarily a Japanese Django remake, it is a Japanese Django prequel, and the gatling gun is still here. Sukiyaki Western Django is an intentional joke that triumphs, a truly wonderful film that should have you smiling throughout.

http://www.thedevilschair.com/

While searching for tickets for the Toronto film festival, a little film called the Devil’s Chair caught my eye. I researched more information and came to the conclusion that it’s a creative homage to Hellraiser, at least based on what I read anyways. From what I was told, and what I read I should have been impressed with Adam Mason’s Devil’ Chair. And another thing, I haven’t seen Broken (Adam Mason’s and Simon Boye’s previous film) but who the fuck is Adam Mason? And why do I care that this is his film? What balls he’s got billing the poster with his name. Like anyone really cares. And I don’t mean any disrespect but this film was so poorly marketed it’s a shame. Because had I known that I’d be watching a parody, I probably would have enjoyed it more.

The film opens with a full narration, which continues until the finale. We’re told by Nick West (Andrew Howard) that some shit went down, and he’s been face to face with demons, not his demons, but real demons. He takes us back to where it all started, the abandoned asylum. He and his girlfriend (Polly Brown) went to check out the asylum. Nick decides it’s a good time to take some acid. He slips it into his mouth and into his girlfriends. Afterwards they find what resembles a gothic electric chair. They start making out on it, kissing, masturbating, and showing each other off to one another when Sammy, his girlfriend, disappears. She’s been teleported to another room, where she awaits her death. Nick is charged with the murder and institutionalized. Four years later, he is released on the condition that his doctor (David Gant) takes him back to the scene of the crime to settle everyone once and for all. Nick doesn’t think it’s a good idea, and it isn’t. Will Nick find out what really happened to Sammy, will he survive another night with the Devil’s Chair?

The sad thing is that the first forty to fifty minutes are great, well not great, but good, ok borderline great. It’s got creepy atmosphere, witty and clever narration and great camerawork. That is one good thing that can be said about the entire film, it’s got great camerawork throughout. The problem is that once those fifty minutes are up, the film takes a dive into parody. With ridiculous twists and turns that ends up ruining the somewhat tolerable dialogue. Everyone but Nick West seems to be a caricature of what the characters should be and when the film freezes to add Nick’s clever narration it takes away from what the film should be. Now I’m not one to tell someone how to make their film, but the Devil’s Chair would have been a serious contender for top horror picks around the globe had it picked which one it wanted to be. Sooner or later it will go back to a serious horror film, and when we think were back on track, we get shifted back to black humor; parody. Which I wouldn’t have as much of a problem with if I didn’t spend fifty minutes of my time devoting myself to what I think is a serious film. The ending is just a punch in the face after what you go through to reach it.

Because of this the film isn’t necessarily truthful in its intentions and storytelling. It borders reality and fantasy; they are allowed to bend the rules and do what they want since the bulk of the film is not real. The acting is bad, which doesn’t necessarily hurt the film, but contributes to its fantasy theme. Ultimately, once I found out it was fantasy, which is late into the film, I grew disappointed and bored. Its identity crisis really damages the film and stops it from becoming what the filmmakers wanted it to be. If it stuck to a genre it would have been much better because Adam Mason and Simon Boyes have a real horror movie on their hands. It’s drenched in blood and contains some horrifying scenes, particularly the ending despite its disappointments. The demon is OK, I suppose but I like my demons without robes. I’m more of a Cronenberg kind of guy so I enjoy more skin, more demon skin. The FX work is great. The blood, did I say there is a lot of blood? is not used sparingly. All of the horror elements work very well in this film, if only Mason and Boyes could have found a way to better support them with the script, which is dull and predictable. The dialogue is horrendous and situations are laughable. When the plot moves, it moves like a retarded gimp, it doesn’t know where it’s going or why. And I’ve already told you the acting is bad, but Dr. Willard (David Grant) is awful. The audience was laughing at him, and they shouldn’t have been.

The film looks like it was shot on some kids lunch money and its identity crisis doesn’t help. It’s a disappointing film that I’m sure Mason and Boyes won’t repeat. I hope they won’t repeat because this film showcases enough talent to look forward to their next effort, which I hope wont be a fuck you like this one was. It’s cool that they tried to make their own film that they bent and shaped into their different kind of film but it just doesn’t work.

http://www.myriadpictures.com/Library.aspx?projectid={d018c33d-2de5-43f0-805a-d9cce578f85e}

Click the link above, and then click “High (300k)” at the bottom right corner.

This will be playing at the Toronto Film Festival, alongside Diary of the Dead and The Devil’s Chair. I plan on reviewing those if I can see them.

Director: Guerdon Trueblood
Year: 1973
Genre: Crime/Thriller

Few words can really describe how truly bizarre The Candy Snatchers is. I’m hardly shocked now-a-days but my dear lord this was one of the best experiences I’ve had. The movie is hilarious, intentionally or unintentionally I couldn’t say, but I certainly did not expect such a bizarre film. The film opens with young 16 year old Candy (Susan Sennett) who is walking home from school; she is the only cast member who isn’t clinically insane. What she doesn’t know is that she’s about to be kidnapped by three “stick it to the man!” criminals: Jessie (Tiffany Bolling), her calm, sadistic brother Alan (Brad David), and an ex-soldier Eddy (Vince Martorano). It also helps that the credits play through this introduction with “Money is the root of all happiness” playing to it. The title appears under the three of them wearing goofy glasses.

She decides it would be best to hitchhike her way close to home. The trio takes this opportunity to nap her. “Calm down, you’re just being kidnapped.” One of them tells her. Candy tries to take her blindfold off, and Alan starts toying with her, blowing in her ear and such. The gang decides to stash her, as according to Jessie’s plan in a coffin, on the top of a remote hill. The screams Candy makes are truly horrific, and the way the trio handle themselves regarding the situation is beyond comical. It makes an unsettling experience for the viewer. They bury her and as the drive away we are introduced to young mute Sean (Cristophe, that’s right, one name.) who has seen it all. But if he could only talk! His mother is calling for Sean by ringing a large cowbell. “Sean! SEAN-NEW-TON!!!” she screams, in hillbilly fasion.

Sean’s parents are more than awful. At this moment, I realize that everyone in this movie, with the exception of Candy and Sean are truly horrific people, and I have yet to meet the rest of the cast. Candy’s father, an owner of a jewelers shop, might be the worst of them all. The gang’s plan is going well so far, and they tell Candy’s father about the entire situation via telephone. He is meant to gather all the diamonds in the store in exchange for Candy. His reaction kicks off the oncoming freight train of weirdness. He doesn’t say a word, and starts looking around, asking his employees to leave one by one. We cut back and forth between Sean and his parents on route to an important dinner, and the gang celebrating their current situation. Sean notices the van, and tries to warn his father, but this only aggravates his father. Avery (Ben Piazza), Candy’s father, is home and is asking his wife if Candy came home. We find a sense of dread in the air. She doesn’t reply and he tells her that Candy has slept over at a friend’s house. He definitely has plans for something… It turns out that Avery’s wife is an alcoholic and he’s cheating on her with his secretary.

Now it’s the truly bizarre; one of the most fucked up, wickedly evil moment of this film. Sean and his parents are at his father’s boss’s house, preparing for dinner when his boss decides to play around with Sean. “Kid’s love me, I can do anything with them, anything, just watch this.” He says. “Just exactly what did you see… what? Cat gotchur tongue?” It is at this moment that he is informed by Sean’s parents that Sean doesn’t talk. “What do you mean he doesn’t talk, all kids talk.” “Not ours. He has some sort of problem.” “Problem? Ya hear that mother! Doesn’t talk, who ever heard of a kid that doesn’t talk?!” He starts to laugh maniacally. Even young Sean is so confused by his behavior. I cannot describe how utterly weird it is. It is the first real explosion of weirdness. One of many.

It turns out that Sean’s father won’t be getting that big promotion anymore because of a kid who doesn’t talk! His parents rip young Sean out of the car and send him to his room. His mother doesn’t want to see him again. A little later, she grabs Sean from his bead and starts beating him senseless. I’m telling you, everyone is fucked up in this movie.

So now Avery hasn’t shown up for the drop and the gang is getting worried, their simple perfect crime was not so simple and perfect anymore. They decide to take Candy out of the coffin and take her into the house. They feed her, and it turns out that Eddy isn’t that bad of a guy after all, he takes her to the bathroom to let her use the toilet. This is when I start to realize how much I like Candy, how well Susan Sennett plays her and how frightening her cries are. Candy is certain she will be killed, where as Eddy is promising her safety. Once Candy falls asleep, the gang starts revising their plan. Eddy clearly states how he does not, and will not work for the man, not him, uh-uh! They decide the best course of action would be to cut her ear and send it in a box. They record Candy screaming for her fathers help, her screams are both horrifying and hilarious at the same time. One cannot help but laugh at the inaudible screams, but a true sense of death and despair is easily noticeable. They decide that there are easier ways of getting an ear; they head to the morgue where we meet good ol’ Charlie, a jivin’ motherfucka who sewed a finger at 10:00 for $35. But it’s inside the morgue that I got a weird feeling that he’s into necrophilia, the way he caresses the dead bodies screams passion.


From here the trio’s plans starts to go a-wire. They start ad-libbing the fate of Candy and their plan. We find out Avery’s true intentions and the fact that he’s Candy’s Stepfather. We also see the trio start to turn on each other while trying to stay on course. Sean tries to save Candy by using a doll that screams “Police! Open up!” but reaches a delicatessen instead; another bizarre scene. The trio shares a comical connection which makes their moments on screen believable. The scenes where the gang meet Candy’s mother are very amusing. Another shed on the terrible parenting Sean receives is evident when his mother tries to feed him downers to put him to sleep. There is another rape scene that is truly the most unsettling moment of this film. The finale is so great that I mustn’t tell you.

The acting is great, considering all things in play. Enough cannot be said about Susan Sennett’s portrayal of Candy. Without her sweet, innocent and cute display, the film would be nothing. Same can be said for everyone else. If they weren’t so over the top I wouldn’t be interested in Candy’s fate. Ben Piazza plays the heartless stepfather with obscurity perfectly. The film screams 70’s with every vibrant heartbeat. The fact that Candy and Sean are the only two sane people of the film helps the audience to connect with them, allowing us to feel more frightened when it comes to her fate. Cristophe (Sean) is able to communicate fluently without sounds or words, but rather by facial expressions. It’s remarkable how well he does it as well.


The Candy Snatchers contains some great twists and turns, and a lively script that is as funny as it is brutal and malicious. With an overlapping element of bizarre characters this movie represents how money may in fact be the root of all happiness, but obtaining the money certainly is not. Some consider this movie pale in comparison to Last House on the Left, but I disagree; The Candy Snatchers involves some pretty horrific and menacing themes and situations. And by pretty, I mean Candy. Trueblood finishes the film with a brilliant overhead crane shot that would put Wes Craven to shame. The film never ceases to stop entertaining, or at the very least keep you interested. With twists and turns from every direction and a hilarious and discerning as well as brutal and sad ending finishes the film off with a bang. Certainly rape, murder, backstabbing, kidnapping and the rest of the horrors this film has to offer isn’t funny, but one cannot help but laugh with its groovy soundtrack and funny dialogue. It’s hard to take seriously, but very easy to enjoy. There are so many things going on in this movie that it warrants more than one viewing.

So, so, so, so, so good.

Maybe I sounded excited to watch Night of the Comet a few hours ago, but that was before I realized how much I hate valley girls. The movie starts off with some pretty decent voiceover work, explaining how the comet hasn’t been seen in 60-someoddm million years ago. Then come the shots of the entire town celebrating and parading the comet’s descent. God, all that hair. Sometimes I forget how terrible the 80’s style really was. Everyone looks like acid headed witches. It makes me sick. With that said I’m glad girls don’t play video games anymore because the opening shots of Regina (Catherine Mary Stewart of The Last Starfighter and Weekend at Bernie’s fame) are some of the most unattractive viewings. She’s giving some shitty video game you’ve never heard of all she’s got. We find out not only is the bitch an usher and is supposed to be working, but she’s got almost ever high score on there, except for one; DMK’s 6^th place record. I wish I was that good at anything. Her boss tells her to get to the projection room and ‘they better not fuck!’ or something. In comes Larry who is trying to bootleg “It Came From Outer Space”, oh how clever! He makes a joke about having sex with her, she retorts and he makes a joke about Superman and then the unthinkable happens. She corrects him on his incorrectness regarding Superman’s ability to see through steel, the walls they are about to fuck between (like I spoiled anything…).

Then we are introduced to her sister, Samantha who is at a house party, she gets in a fight with her cheating stepmother Gloria. Both rip on each other and there is a painful moment of awkward acting. The two slap each other, and Gloria returns a haymaker Samantha’s way. She quickly tells that asshole (Samantha’s words, not mine) Brian she’s glad she doesn’t have kids. What-a-bitch.

Now the movie magic begins. The comet emits a hazy acid trip on the viewers, and turns them into dust. Here we take the surprisingly great pleasure of eerie empty shots of the city. Streets are covered in reddish dust and clothing of those who died there. The sky holds a red glare that resembles a constant sunset. Cars are still parked; some are even on playing music. The emptiness creates a truly desolate atmosphere that allows the viewer to take a glimpse of the possible post-apocalyptic world. There is a nice scene where an automated machine clown starts moving its arms in the empty street; Scary stuff. It’s a shame I have to see that dumb bitch Regina again.

Apparently Larry and Regina slept through the whole night in the projection room. Larry is a pimp, but an angry pimp. He still hasn’t gotten his copy of “It Came From Outer Space”. So he goes outside to see if whoever got it is returning it. In comes the zombie with a wrench. Clonk! Larry starts to twitch and what comes next is awesome, just awesome. The zombie does what I think is another bash with the wrench, but it lands nowhere near Larry, who in turn bobs his head from the nonexistent contact. Regina goes to check on Larry, after she knocks DMK out of the 6^th spot and apparently into no spot. Wouldn’t she have to play at least 6 games to do that? She sure showed him. Anyways, she gets locked out and proceeds to the back of the multiplex. She finds Larry’s keys and proceeds to his motorbike until a zombie in bright orange pops out from the empty boxes holding a large piece of meat. She warns him that she’s trained to defend herself from this. She throws the keys at the motorbike for some reason, and then kicks the shit out of the zombie. The music kicks in, and it’s got a large devo-jazz to it. It’s hysterical. They start to dance real close until she breaks loose and hops on the bike, traveling the empty city somewhat puzzled, but not enough to have a truly worried look on her face. The dumb bitch even stops next to an empty car at an intersection rocking her head to the 80’s pop coming from it. Are you serious? How can I give a shit about anyone that stupid? At this point I’m praying for her to die like Larry did, or hopefully better.

She meets up with her sister, who slept in a steel shed apparently for the hell of it since she had no where else to go, and they went to the radio station thinking the DJ was there. They meet Hector, a suave trucker. He inspects the girls, and then puts the moves on Regina. It was a moment in awkward sexual tension history. It turns out Regina’s dad is a Green Beret and her and Samantha know how to fire a gun or two. Too bad the only thing they shoot is a fucking car, and some losers in a mall but I’ll get to them later.

After this the movie hits a bunch of roadblocks and seems to get trapped in a maze. It doesn’t know where to go and where to stay. The addition of a think tank that’s also been infected was a little troublesome. Samantha has a scary dream about some zombie cops pulling her over (she did some drinking on the empty highways, naughty, naughty). The zombie grabs her head from the window and she starts clawing at his hand. Blood starts to flow. My eyes widen and I realize I’ve witnessed the first truly violent and worthwhile moment of the film. I get a sign of relief, too bad it won’t last long. Samantha screams, wakes up and heads to the bathroom.

“The way this movies been going, this is probably another dream, wait what is she doing? Is she taking a shower? But there is only a sink… Wait is that a cop? Is this… another… dream? Ah FUCK!”

That’s right, a double dream, so obvious that it’s overly long timeline is painful. I feel like the filmmakers gave me the finger, a big “Fuck you!”. The think tank needed blood from the survivors to create a cure, but one its members who is an insanely tall freak show of a woman is starting to lose ‘memery’ and thinks that it’s hopeless. Yeah, she’s gonna kill herself later. God I’m remembering the structure of this movie and it’s so outrageously unorganized it’s quite funny. From here it hops back and forth between Hector, Regina and her sister and the think tank. Hector tries to save his family (and ends up getting chased by a fucking zombie boy, PUSSY!) and Regina and Samantha go shopping. That’s right, shopping. Valley Girls make even the apocalypse boring.

So now their shopping at a mall (so right there…DAWN) and dancing for a good 2 minutes; 2 minutes that I’m seriously debating turning the movie off until I see that someone is watching them. It’s the punks who used to work there but now ‘own’ it and are upset that Regina and Samantha are stealing, which is beyond a doubt one of the lamest things I’ve ever witnessed. But it’s not a surprise considering the losers that come down look like 80’s computer nerds with devo punk-wear. I guess it’s not hard to look like a badass when there are only a few people left in the world.

After some cute gunplay in the mall, the half zombified stock boys are slain by the research group who has come for the sisters. They meet up with two children also gathered by the think tank. The tall psycho woman kills Samantha and then her partner. Hector arrives dressed as Santa (its Christmas!) at the radio station with gifts for Regina and Samantha. I don’t care. He gets the information from the huge ugly bitch about their plan before she kills herself with some injection. He concocts a truly genius plan. He lures the guard at the research center to the trunk, where Samantha is there waiting to punch him. Yeah, turns out she wasn’t dead; further proof Hector is a fuckin’ pussy.

Whatever, they escape, a car blows up, it’s not important at all. A storm arrives the next day washing all dust and clothes away purifying the streets with a ‘forever rain’ sort of smell. The kids, Regina and Hector are all dressed up, the girl is still holding the teddy bear she arrived at the research center with, and the boy still has his football. Samantha is looking like a whore all by herself. They drag this stupid bit about the lights on the intersection when none other than DMK rolls along in his nice car. Samantha basically gives herself to him and they all roll away happy as ever. Hector and the gang throw the pigskin around. He’s got one hell of an arm; I bet he’ll make the team this year!

Honestly, I wanted to like this movie, there are parts that I liked and my experience wasn’t a bad one, It was rather laughable in many ways. It was hit and miss with its jokes, some of which are great some of which are bad but still funny; it has an authentic 80’s feel. If that’s enough to warrant a watch, then be my guest. It’s just hard to like a movie that’s about a bunch of uninteresting people alone in an empty city with hardly any zombies to boot. Most of it’s supposed to be taken with a campy attitude. It’s just rather difficult to do it with its poorly structured unoriginal story. There are too few zombies to make it a zombie movie. Day of the Dead did the whole “empty/ruined city” thing a whole lot better, and why even bother incorporating a mall? Dawn perfected it. They had a better mall and they had a better gang in it. It’s hard not to mention Dawn when there is a mall in a zombie flick. The zombies have an Evil Dead look to them which makes the brief appearances they make worthwhile. It’s unfocused, unorganized and rather undefined. Why bother with this when you can find a movie that has done anything Night of the Comet did, only better. My advice: Don’t, well maybe once.

I guess I’ll start from zero tomorrow morning. I expect to review Night of the Comet, since I still have to watch it. Then I’ll probably hit the Re-Animator millenium edition.

For now, let me tell you about a nice deal amazon has just in case you haven’t yet heard of it. Amazon has both it’s HDDVD/Bluray catelog 30% off.

And as for HD content, Blade Runner: Ultimate Collection will be on both Blu-ray, HD DVD/DVD on December 18th. It comes in Rick Deckard’s briefcase. This limited edition release will include a “lenticular motion film clip from the original feature, miniature origami unicorn figurine, miniature replica spinner car, and collector’s photographs, as well as a signed personal letter from Sir Ridley Scott.” says Amazon.
HD DVD and Blu-ray will cost $69.95 USD, where as DVD will cost $54.95 USD, and that is with Amazon’s 30% Discount.

Special Features:

Disc One

• Ridley Scott’s all-new ‘Final Cut’ version of the film
• Restored and remastered with added & extended scenes, added lines, new and cleaner special effects and all new 5.1 Dolby Digital Audio
• Commentary by Ridley Scott
• Commentary by Executive Producer/ Co-Screenwriter Hampton Fancher and Co-Screenwriter David Peoples; Producer Michael Deely and production executive Katherine Haber
• Commentaries by visual futurist Syd Mead; production designer Lawrence G. Paull, art director David L. Snyder and special photographic effects supervisors Douglas Trumbull, Richard Yuricich and David Dryer

Disc Two

• Documentary - Dangerous Days: Making Blade Runner. A feature-length authoritative documentary revealing all the elements that shaped this hugely influential cinema landmark. Cast, crew, critics and colleagues give a behind-the-scenes, in-depth look at the film — from its literary roots and inception through casting, production, visuals and special effects to its controversial legacy and place in Hollywood history.

Disc Three

• 1982 THEATRICAL VERSION - This is the version that introduced U.S. movie-going audiences to a revolutionary film with a new and excitingly provocative vision of the near-future. It contains Deckard/Harrison Ford’s character narration and has Deckard and Rachel’s (Sean Young) “happy ending” escape scene.
• 1982 INTERNATIONAL VERSION - Also used on U.S. home video, laserdisc and cable releases up to 1992. This version is not rated, and contains some extended action scenes in contrast to the Theatrical Version.
• 1992 DIRECTOR’S CUT - The Director’s Cut omits Deckard’s voiceover narration and removes the “happy ending” finale. It adds the famously-controversial “unicorn” sequence, a vision that Deckard has which suggests that he, too, may be a replicant.

Disc Four

• BONUS DISC - “Enhancement Archive”
• Featurette The Electric Dreamer: Remembering Philip K. Dick
• Featurette Sacrificial Sheep: The Novel vs. The Film
• Philip K. Dick: The Blade Runner Interviews (Audio)
• Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep Cover Gallery (Images)
• The Art of Blade Runner (Image Galleries)
• Featurette Signs of the Times: Graphic Design
• Featurette Fashion Forward: Wardrobe & Styling
• Screen Tests: Rachel & Pris
• Featurette The Light That Burns: Remembering Jordan Cronenweth
• Unit Photography Gallery
• Deleted & Alternate Scenes
• 1982 Promotional Featurettes
• Trailers & TV Spots
• Featurette Promoting Dystopia: Rendering the Poster Art
• Marketing & Merchandise Gallery (Images)
• Featurette Deck-A-Rep: The True Nature of Rick Deckard
• Featurette Nexus Generation: Fans & Filmmakers

Disc 5

• Workprint Version - This rare version of the film is considered by some to be the most radically different of all the Blade Runner cuts. It includes an altered opening scene, no Deckard narration until the final scenes, no “unicorn” sequence, no Deckard/Rachel “happy ending,” altered lines between Batty (Rutger Hauer) and his creator Tyrell (Joe Turkell), alternate music and much more.
• Commentary by Paul M. Sammon, author of Future Noir: The Making of Blade Runner
• Featurette All Our Variant Futures: From Workprint to Final Cut
• Lenticular motion film clip from the original feature
• Miniature origami unicorn figurine
• Miniature replica spinner car
• Collector’s photographs
• Signed personal letter from Sir Ridley Scott

(taken from http://www.ezydvd.com.au/item.zml/793565)

A 5 HD DVD disc box set for 70 sounds like a steal to me. 5 different cuts, featurettes up the ass, and a feature length documentary sounds like my kind of christmas. Mom, are you reading this?